Thursday, November 06, 2008

Beware: Change Is Coming

Ever since Barack Obama beat both the Clinton and the Republican propoganda machines and defied all odds by actually being elected President, Americans have been eager to experience the monumental change he has promised. Here are just a few examples of the concerns that have been raised to the propsective leader so far.

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President Obama,

You promised change. It's been two full days now, and so far I don't feel any change. Or are we still in the change gestation period of hope? Please let me know when to expect my change coming.

Thanks

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President Obama,

A lot of people where I work are still responding to the Republican fear machine and it's really annoying. What can you do to assure them that you're not planning to take away their right to bear arms, dissolve the military, give one hundred percent of their income to "less deserving" families, enact a fully universal healthcare program, and collapse our economy?

Thanks

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President Obama,

There's a girl I'm interested in who seems interested in me, but says she can't date at the moment. Could you find a way to change this situation for me please?

Thanks

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President Obama,

You never did outline what you intended to do about the weather. Sometimes it's too hot, sometimes it's too cold, and when it's not trying to drown us, it's trying to blow us off the map. Could you use some of your legendary change powers to divert next year's rainfall to California to put out their wildfires, and away from the Midwest so we can grow crops again?

Thanks

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President Obama,

I find it hard to believe that medical science has developed a pill that can give a person a four-hour erection and has an exercise pill and cybernetic technologies on the horizon, yet we still have not found anywhere near an effective cure for baldness. Could you please work that into your universal health care plan?

Thanks

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President Obama,

I've waited a year and a half for a determination on my veterans' disability status, and the day after you were elected, I found out that I was approved. I waited a year and a half under Bush for my disability entitlements, and one day under you. I have to say that change has come and it feels good. Thank you for all your help.

Thanks

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