Friday, October 03, 2008

One Step Closer To The Idiocracy

Between Ann Coulter and Sarah Palin, it seems that the Republicans will only let a woman out of the kitchen if she is either hot or insane. Sarah Palin has generous amounts of both, but keep in mind that no matter how much you want to vote for her, she will never, ever, fuck you.

I wish everyone would stop talking about how impressed they are at Sarah Palin's performance during the debate. It's not hard to exceed expectations when you've set the bar as low as it's been since Dan Quayle.

After the debate, I've concluded that Sarah Palin's voice grates on my nerves like nails on a chalkboard and if I hear the word "maverick" again after this election is over, it's liable to make me want to shoot people in the face.

Sarah Palin talks like Bobby's mom from Bobby's World. I kept expecting to hear her say "Don'tcha know" after every sentence.

Her use of common, working class expressions and self-censored obscenities were about as misplaced and ill-timed as Tom Brokaw covering a DMX song.

Stop trying to convince America that you're just another working mom who understands the plight of the working class. When your net worth is $1.2 million, I doubt you have to worry much about choosing between health care and food.

Surely I couldn't have been the only one who cringed when she gave a shout-out during the debate. You're a Vice Presidential nominee, not a rapper picking up an MTV Video Music Award.

I'm tired of hearing Palin brag about being the governor of the "largest state in the nation." Land mass doesn't count when you have more polar bears and seals than people. Rhode Island has more people than Alaska, and it's the smallest state.

It's quite obvious that she has little to no knowledge, experience or personal political convictions. She was clearly prepped to cover it with rhetoric and buzz words. When pressed to form an opinion of her own, she just fell back on campaign talking points.

To be fair, Joe Biden didn't fare too much better, but at least he could draw upon specific examples of personal experience when answering questions instead of reiterating that he is the "original maverick."

James Garner is the original Maverick. Shut the fuck up.


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