Sunday, April 13, 2008

Going Old School On New Amsterdam

Continuing my inspection of the TVTome forums, I decided to spy on the New Amsterdam forum. I considered trying House, but there wasn't enough drama in that forum, seeing as House is awesome, and every thread is either an episodic discussion of how awesome House is or a collection of awesome House quotes.

I needed something with a lot of drama because it's one of the many unequivocal laws of the Internet that wherever you find a forum full of drama, you'll find a forum full of utter stupidity.
Last week, I chose the American Idol forum because what is American Idol if not a huge collection of drama, tension, angst, and thinly disguised homoerotic overtones? With its campy premise and alleged ripping off just about every single concept having anything to do with immortality, I figured New Amsterdam forum would be the perfect choice.

Get back in line, you. No cutsies.

Did you just have a seizure over this?

You're right. We should wait for Britannica to chronicle the show before we make our final determination on this important matter.

If he's four hundred years old, then she's got to be at least, what, a thousand?

I have nothing against him being gay, but dating a black woman? That's just pure desperation.

Now it's a rip-off of Highlander, How I Met Your Mother, and some romance novel no one gives a shit about.

This exact point has me yelling at the TV every week. The Indian woman who can't act explicitly states this in the opening credits. I can't understand why no one on the show can retain that vital piece of information longer than a few minutes every single episode.

In season two, they go on a wacky space adventure!

That is hands-down the worst poem I've ever read.

Hey, remember Forever Knight? Of course not, that was over a decade ago!

Maybe she'll be a necrophiliac.

Maybe after a while they got bored and started offering it for tits like beads at Mardi Gras.

I guarantee you right now there are probably at least ten websites dedicated to fanfics of John Amsterdam and Duncan MacLeod fucking each other.

I think we should do that for every show. We could be responsible for the renewal of Car 54 Where Are You? Want to see Ag Report in prime time? Lord knows I do!

np: Symphony X - "Domination"


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