Friday, December 21, 2007

Status Update #2

I finally realized why I've hit such a creative block lately. Let's see, I've been doing a post a day for thre years. I have over 1200 posts right now. Most feature columnists limit themselves to one column per week, if not one per month. Using one per week as a standard, that means I've written enough posts to cover over 23 years of writing for the average columnist.

Granted, not all of my posts are feature length. Some of them are barely over a couple sentences. I'm not going to go back and figure out how many posts I've written that are equitable to the typical feature column in length or time spent, but I figure that anything over 500 words or over an hour spent on research and development could count. (For instance, my Sunday posts don't contain a lot of original content, but they take a while to produce because I have to find a stupid forum and enough stupid posts in that stupid form to make stupid comments about; I think they should count.) If I figure that even half of my posts are comparable with the average feature column, it means I've written over 11.5 years' worth of columns.

No wonder I'm burnt out. There are only so many topics I can reiterate in new and refreshing ways, and although it's not impossible to find new topics, they just don't crop up every day once I have the bulk of them covered already. It's nothing really wrong with my brain not being able to put out quality content anymore, it's the fact that I've been pushing myself too hard for too long, and it became the standard in my mind. I didn't realize I was pushing too hard, but now that I have, it's a real breakthrough. I can pull back and not push myself harder than most people and become frustrated when I fail to meet a standard that I had already set too high.

That being said, I think I'm going to scrap at least one criteria I mentioned last week for the upcoming year. I'm not going to set a day or deadline for any posts. I want to have unrestricted freedom. This hiatus made me realize that it's okay to post when I have something interesting to say, and refrain when I don't. I'm going to dedicate my time to other pursuits, like writing for publication and having a life not necessarily connected to this blog. I'm going to make posts when I get an idea and flesh it out properly, instead of passing off an end product I'm not happy with to meet the midnight deadline. I can't promise how many I'll write or how often I'll post, but I'm going to at least try not to go weeks without adding new content. Every few days, probably, but the key next year is going to be no pressure. It's going to take some time for me to get used to that philosophy.

Right now, I have the worst sinus infection yet. Pretty soon I'm going to have to take off my shoes to keep track of all the sinus infections I'm getting this year. I think this one might have a bit of a cold with it because my head hurts worse than usual and my joints are aching. I can only sleep for a few hours at a time, and it usually makes me end up feeling worse than before I went to bed. I feel like I've been hit by a Mack truck driven by death. So I'm not sure how often I'm going to be posting during my hiatus until I get over this. Some of the things I originally intended to post, like for this coming Sunday, Christmas, and possibly even New Year's might get overlooked this year, because I just can't make myself focus on much right now.

Sorry if this post was a bad read. My throbbing head is really distracting right now.


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