Monday, January 29, 2007

While You Were Out

I haven't signed on to Yahoo! Messenger for months. When I did finally sign on, my "offline messages" box was chock full of stupid crap from spambots programmed by retards. Yeah, I'm leaving the email addresses in these because they don't belong to real human beings. You can investigate their authenticity purely at your own peril.
I've been told that my juices taste real good, would you like to taste them for yourself?, if so, send me an email and I'll give you a sample.: hrni_woman9236 at hotmail.
Do you do grape? I do like some grape juice.
I'm a very good looking gal with a nice pair of t**s, if you're a sucker for them, just drop me an email at: luvngirls362 at hotmail
Emphasis on "sucker" if you choose to respond to this.
I'm a young girl willing to learn some of the tricks you have learned throughout your life, if you're interested in becoming my teacher, drop me an email at: hrny_blonde86670 at hotmail
Silly blonde, tricks are for kids!
My huisband is cheating on me! I would like to pay him with that same bill... Would you like to be the guy that helps me with that= Let me know at: suprsxy_beauty1788 at hotmail
Sounds expensive.
I\'m very interested in having some fun with you, if you know what I mean , just drop me an email and let the fun begin!.: prty_girl2986 at hotmail
Okay, but you have to supply your own Transformers. I'm rather protective of mine.
Do you think you're too old?, hey don't feel bad about it!, age is just a number, so they say, contact me and let me make you feel like you felt a long time ago.: horny4604wf at hotmail
A long time ago? Like when I was six? I'm not that old.
I\'m stuck in a rut and I need someone to get me out of it before I go nuts!. I\'m open to any suggestions, let me hear about them at: neeedywoman991 at hotmail
How about a Jeep with a winch?
Fine lady looking for a naughty and horny guy that can please me! Let me know if you can handle me, let me know at: hrniluv5550 at hotmail
Whenever someone says, "Let me know if you can handle me," I just automatically assume that I don't want to go to the trouble.
I have great imagination when it comes to sex! Do you think that you can handle all my wild Ideas? If you think you can send me a message at: hrny_1ady41295 at hotmail
Go read the John K. Pe-Ta mangas and await further assignments.
If you're a funny guy looking for an outgoing girl to hang out with, look no more, just send me an email at: nic438blonde at hotmail
No really, I'm sure all the outgoing girls have to resort to randomly instant messaging strangers for dates. Perfectly normal behavior.
Hello there handsome, do you remember me?. I know it\'s been awhile since we got in touch. Please send me an email, I\'ll be waiting.: hrnilady585 at hotmail
Hey yeah, you were that chick who passed out at Bobby's party. His dog raped you while you were unconscious. He made a fortune from selling the video online. Of course I don't remember you, because we never fucking met.
Are you looking for a cyber-buddy that can please you as you have never ben pleased! Just write a line or two at: lsty1ady402 at hotmail
Wait, who's this "Ben"? I don't know if I can trust a woman who randomly calls out other men's names in their introductory instant message.
Is your life a mess?. Let me relieve some of that stress with my erotic massages, just contact me at: horni_beauty07017 at hotmail
Yes my life is a mess, but in lieu of erotic massages, a substantial monetary donation would be far more helpful. Don't worry, I'm pretty sure you can deduct it from your taxes.
I'm not looking for a steady relationship, I'm just looking to have some fun on the side, if this sounds like something you might be interested in, send me an email at: nize8652woman at hotmail
If you're not looking for a steady relationship, then on the side of what, exactly?
I like to take pictures of myself having sex with people! Lots of people... Would you like to join my fun group? Let me know at: prty611beauty at hotmail
The gaping, gonorrhea-filled maw of death is just not worth the risk.
I would like to talk with you to find out more about your personality, please let me know if you're interested by sending an email at: nic68048luv at hotmail
Fuck, a psychologist.
Are you looking for a good spanking because you haven't been behaving good?, I'll be glad to turn your cheeks red!, contact me at: horni952ldy at hotmail
I don't accept punishments from my intellectual inferiors, sorry.
I'm sure we were exchanging emails and all of the sudden you quit writing to me, I'd like to resume our cyber-friendship, please contact me at: lovely346woman at hotmail
Yeah, there's a reason for that: BECAUSE IT NEVER FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
strickland28311303: Hey sweetheart, what happened to you?, I thought you were interested in me?, please let me know if you're still are or not, ok?, send me an email at: horni56218luv at hotmail
I find it funny that this came from the principal in Back to the Future.

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